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30th Anniversary Reunion
Weekly Workout Print E-mail

My New Weekly Workout

The Doctor told me, that I should start an exercise program and he recommends that all Mururoa Veterans' do the same.

Monday
Beat around the bush
Jump to conclusions
Climb the walls
Wade through the morning paper
 
Tuesday
Drag my heels
Push my luck
Make mountains out of mole hills
Hit the nail on the head
 
Wednesday
 Bend over backwards
Jump on the Band Wagon
Run around in circles
 
Thursday
 Advise the Prime Minister on how to run the Country
Toot my own horn
Pull out all the stops
Add fuel to the fire
 
Friday
 Open a can of worms
Put my foot in my mouth
Start the ball rolling
Go over the edge
 
Saturday
 Pick up the pieces
 
Sunday
 Kneel in prayer
Bow my head in thanksgiving
Uplift my hands in praise
Hug someone and encourage them.
 
Whew!  What a workout! 
 
Words Fail Me Print E-mail

Recently, Royal Marines in Iraq, wrote to "Starbucks" because they wanted to let them know how much they liked their different coffees, and to request that they send some of it to the troops there. 'Starbucks' replied, telling the Marines, thank you for your support of their business, but that 'Starbucks' does not support the war, nor anyone in it, and that they would not send the troops their brand of coffee. So as not to offend 'Starbucks', maybe we should support them by NOT buying any of their products! This war might not be very popular with some folks, but that doesn't mean we don't support the lads on the ground, fighting street-to-street and, house-to-house, getting shot up and in some cases getting killed. They do it so that Company's like 'Starbucks' can carry on trading with the lessened fear of some nutter driving a car loaded with high explosive, in through their front door.

  Also, don't forget that when the Twin Towers were attacked and destroyed, the fire fighters and rescue workers went to 'Starbucks' because it was near, to get water for the survivors and workders, and 'Starbucks' CHARGED THEM FOR IT!!!

 As an added note: 'Starbucks' had coffee shops on several military bases in the United States. They are now being removed because of this. There are 227 'Starbucks' Coffee Shops across the UK and there's no doubt that our Servicemen and Women would probably get the same response from this Company. For myself, I intend to do my bit and boycott 'Starbucks' to show them how  despicable I think their actions are.

 

 
Over 60's In The Armed Forces Print E-mail

I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to track down terrorists. You can't be older that 42 to join the military. They've got the whole thing ass-backwards. Instead of sending 18-year olds off to fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military unit until you're at least 35. Besides, if you tell us old guys we are too old to do something, we will do it, even if it kills us doing it! For Starts: Researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10 seconds. Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a day, (if he's lucky) leaving us more than 28,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy. Young guys haaven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky sailor is a dangerous sailor. "My back hurts! I can't sleep, I'm tired and hungry". We are impatient and maybe letting us kill some a***hole that desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for a while. An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10am. Old guys always get up early to pee, so what the hell.

 Besides, like I said,  "I'm tired and can't sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing some fanatical son-of-a-bitch". If captured we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real brain-teaser. Boot camp would be easier for old guys. We're used to getting screamed and yelled at and we're used to soft food. We've also developed an appreciation for guns. We've been using them for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the screaming and yelling.

They could lighten up on the obstacle course however. I've been in combat and didn't see a single 20 foot wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any push-ups after completing basic training. I can hear the Drill Chief in the "New Navy" now, "Get down and give me.... er ... One." Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too. I've never seen anyone outrun a bullet. An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to shave, and how to start up a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn't figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his head. These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harms way. Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten cowardly terrorists. The last thing an enemy would want to see right now is a couple of million p****d off old farts with attitudes and automatic weapons who know that their best years are already behind them.

Also, we won't get in trouble for mistreating prisoners - we won't take any. If nothing else, put is on border patrol....we will have it secured the first night!

 

 
A Military Man Died Today Print E-mail
He was getting old and paunchy
And his hair was falling fast,
And he sat around the RSA Club,
Telling stories of the past.
 
Of a war that he once fought in
And the deeds that he had done,
In his exploits with his mates;
They were heroes, every one.
 
And though sometimes to his neighbours
His tales became a joke,
All his mates listened quietly
For they knew whereof he spoke. 
 
But we'll hear his tales no longer,
For ol' Bob has passed away,
And the world's a little poorer
For a military man died today.
 
He won't be mourned by many,
Just his children and his wife.
For he lived an ordinary,
very quiet sort of life.
 
He held a job and raised a family,
Going quietly on his way;
And the world won't note his passing.
though a Military man died today.
 
When politicians leave this earth,
Their bodies lie in state,
while thousands note their passing,
And proclaim that they were great.
 
Papers tell of their life stories
From the time that they were young,
But the passing of a serviceman
Goes unnoticed, and unsung.
 
Is the greatest contribution
To the welfare of our land,
Some jerk who breaks his promise
And cons his fellow man?
 
Or the ordinary fellow
Who in times of war and strife,
Goes off to serve his Country
And offers up his life?
 
The politician's stipend
And the style in which he lives,
Are often disproportionate,
To the service that he gives.
 
While the ordinary military man,
Who offered up his all,
Is paid off with a medal
And perhaps a pension, small.
 
  It's so easy to forget them,
For it is so many times,
That our Bobs and Jims
Went to battle, but we still pine.
 
It was not the politicians
With their compromise and ploys,
Who won for us the freedom
That our Country now enjoys.
 
Should you find yourself in danger,
With your enemies at hand,
Would you really want some cop-out,
With his ever waffling stand.
 
Or would you want a Military man,
His home, his country, his kin,
Just a common Military man,
Who would fight until the end?
 
He was just a common Military man,
And his ranks are growing thin,
But his presence should remind us
We may need his like again.
 
For when Countries are in conflict,
We find the Military man's part
Is to clean up all the troubles
That the politicians start.
 
If we cannot do him honour
While he's here to hear the praise,
Then at least let's give him homage
At the ending of his days.
 
Perhaps just a simple headline
In the paper that might way:
"OUR COUNTRY IS IN MOURNING,
A MILITARY MAN DIED TODAY."
 
- author unknown - 
 
This May Happen to You Print E-mail

A man walked into a supermarket with his zipper down.

A lady cashier walked up to him and said, "Your barracks door is open".

Not a phrase that men normally use, he went on his way looking a bit puzzled.

Just as he was about done shopping, a man came up and said, "Your fly is open,"

He zipped up and finished his shopping.

At the checkout, he intentionally got in the line where the lady was that told him about his "barracks door". He figured he would have a little fun with her, so when he reached the counter he said, "When you saw my barracks door open, did you see a Marine standing in there at attention?"

The lady (naturally smarter that the man) thought for a moment and said, "No, no I didn't. All I saw was a disabled veteran sitting on a couple of old duffel bags."

 

 
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